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Marital Relationship Between a Melancholy and a Phlegmatic Temperaments.

This is a marital relationship between two introverted individuals, since they both of them possess almost similar strengths and weaknesses. Except that the Melancholy’s mood swings could sometimes lifts them to a height were they could act like extroverts or make them completely withdrawn and unexcited, while a Phlegmatic is usually consistent in their behavioral pattern and outward disposition.

A marital relationship between these two individuals will no doubt be very quiet, lovely and peaceful at the early stages because they seem attracted to, and understand themselves from a distance, and they’ll also relish being with each other.

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A typical melancholy and phlegmatic or phlegmatic and marriage is easily the most peaceful and romantic of all relationships, since both of them often finds desirable qualities in each other, untill they begin to encounter challenges.

A Melancholy is easily attracted to his or her phlegmatic partner’s calm, quiet, gentle, gracious and organized qualities. While the phlegmatic is pleased and enticed by a melancholy’s intelligence, gentle and quiet nature, and the way he or she carries and comports him or herself in public. Both of them will naturally fall in love with each other at first sight because of these qualities, but rarely do they really know what they want or expect from one another at the early stages of their marriage.

These are the two temperaments that goes into marriage or relationship without any prior experience, since they were raised by melphleg or phlegmel parents who are too shy to teach them about sex, relationship and marriage. Moreover, since they’re also introverts who often keeps to themselves and hardly associates with others, it makes them ignorant of their basic needs before going into marriage. It’s an enlightened and exposed melancholy or phlegmatic that really knows what they want when it comes to marriage in the early ages of their life.

Melphlegs or phlegmels could get easily attracted to each other, fall in love and get along very well with one another, but I still do not fancy them to be best compatible couples, even though some school of thought actually believes they are. Different persons could have different reasons for wanting to marry who they want to marry. But when it comes to marriage, one needs to look beyond the present and look at the bigger picture.

You need to discover what interests rather than impresses you about your would-be spouse. That thing that is capable of keeping you in the marriage should in case your expectations are not met, or what you were seeing at the beginning of your journey could no longer suffice when problems and challenges begins to set in.

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There’s basically no relationship or marriage that’s devoid of conflicts and challenges. Even the most compatible couples had or will at some point in their relationship encounter challenges. But the most important question will be, what is that quality in your spouse that’ll keep you happily moving on with your marriage when every other things had failed. Every other thing may fail, but when you marry someone because of a particular quality they’ve got that often interests you, then you’re sure to have a marriage that can survive any challenge.

It’s only a knowledge and understanding of the different temperaments with their basic strengths and weaknesses that can help you discover the basic qualities you need most in a potential spouse. It’s unfortunate that a lot of persons do not really know what they want in someone they’re interested in, and some often misconstrues what interests with what impresses them.

It’s for this reasoWhen you marry someone because they impress you, then you’re getting them for a short term, but if you marry because they’ve got some strengths and qualities that interests you, then you’re in for a long term relationship with them.

You can’t be a melancholy whose basic needs, desires and expectations from your spouse is loyalty, discipline, commitment, self-confidence and bold disposition in public, and you expect to always be happy in a marriage with a person whose natural temperament does not epitomize these qualities.

Despite how nice, calm, gentle and loving they may be, it will not suffice to make you feel happy and satisfied if they do not possess those initial basic qualities that are the major strengths of a particular temperament.

Similarly, it will be difficult for a typical phlegmatic to perpetually hold on to a partner or find reasons to always forgive a partner whose temperament is lacking in courage, self-confidence, motivation and commitment because these are their basic needs, that will keep them interested in the marriage.

It’s basically for this reason that i do not consider typical melancholies and phlegmatics to be the best compatible temperament for marriage, even though they could make very good partners. Even in terms of fulfilling their marital sexual obligation to each other, they often find themselves very attractive on 🛏️ bed.

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When these two face external pressures and aggression, it more often than not overwhelms them, since neither of them will be bold and courageous enough to confront it, or motivate the other to go ahead and face it, since they’re both shy and timid. But if external and internal conflicts or challenges does not find its way in their marriage, they can be the best couples, with a loving and peaceful family to relish.

I know of two melphleg couples who were attracted to each other because of their quite, gentle and calm nature. They fell in love with each other during their college years in Russia after the female phlegmatic had turned down advances from other male colleagues in the same department.

The man, who must be a melancholy, after watching from a distance, seeing that each one of those who tries to get her attention had all failed in their attempt, he quickly made his intentions known to her, which she willingly accepted. They got engaged and finally got married in Russia before relocating back to settle in Nigeria.

Several years down the line, they had four kids, and the woman became a professor and a lecturer in one of the foremost Nigerian university, while the man got a job in an oil and gas company in another state. He lived and worked in this state for over twelve years without his phlegmatic wife paying him a visit because she was overwhelmed by her trust for him, which is usually a phlegmatic’s characteristic. And since he always comes to be with her every weekend, then return to work at the beginning of a new working week, thus, she did not see it as a necessity knowing where he lived in that state.

Now, the Crux of the matter is that, during these twelve years of his sojourn in that state, he had built another family. He got married and had another four kids with another woman from the state. He never told his first phlegmatic wife about it, because he feared that he had betrayed the trust she had on him, which is usually a typical melancholic trait. Now, guess who he married.

A predominant choleric woman, whose courage, boldness, and fearlessness is very intimidating. To cut the story short, he’s living happily together with both of them in the same compound but different apartments. Eventhough his typical phlegmatic first wife is not happy about it, but does it matter? No, it doesn’t matter to him. Because that’s who he had always wanted and should have married, but could not figure it out back then in the university.

Both melancholies and phlegmatics seems to admire and are often attracted to the brave, courageous, fearless and hard working nature of the Cholerics, since they lack these qualities themselves. Similarly, Cholerics are also easily attracted to melancholy’s and phlegmatic’s loyalty, calm, quiet, organized and intelligent qualities. Eventhough melphlegs and phlegmel could admire one another’s qualities at face value, and often gets emotionally attached, but they always admires a choleric who exudes these masculine qualities.

Barring pressures of any kind or internal and external conflicts, melphlegs or phlegmels could get along very well. Their passion for each other will be ignited, and they feel more emotional for each other than any other temperament. They’re extremely romantic couples when alone, and sextime for them is a warm and funtime with gentle romance and caressing. Melphleg or phlegmel kids are very disciplined, intelligent, loving, calm and gentle kids.

But they’ll often battle with shyness, fear and low self-esteem. You can order and read my recent book; Demystifying the melancholy personality in erotic relationship, to perfectly understand who a typical melancholy is, when it comes to erotic relationship like marriage and dating, and how to live with your moody and nagging melancholy sweetheart.

The phlegmatic personality in erotic and interpersonal relationship demystified will also enable you to better understand who a predominant phlegmatic is, and how to relate and deal appropriately with him or her.

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